Leaders’ Goal Should Be To Bring God’s People To Maturity

Recently, we’ve been examining the Bible’s instructions for Christian meetings. The Bible uses the words, “everyone, each one, anyone, and all” to describe who speaks in a Christian meeting. God desires to manifest his grace through each member of the body of Christ. The “gifts of the Spirit” or, literally, “grace-manifestations,” usually require speaking. Scripture commands us to teach each other, instruct each other, exhort each other, encourage each other, and more! The Bible is so emphatic about this that the apostle Paul wrote that we should not recognize anybody who does not acknowledge that these instructions are the Lord’s command, not mere suggestions!

Paul wrote in Romans 12:3 (KJV) “For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith.” In First Corinthians 12, God’s grace is manifest in various forms as every member of the body of Christ speaks. The statement that “no member can say to another member ‘I don’t need you'” is in the context of grace-manifestations that usually involve speaking. God does not give all that needs to be said to one person alone.

A leader who expects to be the only one to speak thinks of himself more highly than he ought to think. He’s not thinking soberly, understanding that even as a leader, he is still only one member of the body of Christ. By saying this, I don’t want to be overly critical of leaders’ intentions. Some don’t know any other way of operating. This dynamic has been the status quo for a long time, and it’s not only the leaders’ fault. The church has encouraged it. But a Christian meeting as scripture commands is not a church service as we know it.

Failing to prioritize every member speaking and acting is saying to the other members of the body, “I don’t need you.” Leaders are in position to serve and honor the body of Christ. Honoring every member of Christ’s body involves valuing the grace God gives them and allowing them to speak. If we fail to honor and receive every member of Christ’s body, we fail to honor Christ and receive his grace.

Furthermore, Jesus and the early church taught primarily with questions and answers in a dialogue format. The Bible associates doing God’s will and being able to teach each other with spiritual meat. Jesus taught with dialogue, gave an example to follow, and then quickly sent his disciples to do the same works they saw him do. After three and a half years, he told them, “It’s better for you that I leave.” Jesus’ goal was bringing his disciples to maturity, not giving them baby bottles for the rest of their lives.

Ephesians chapter 4 teaches that Christ gave apostles, prophets, evangelists, pastors, and teachers to equip God’s people for works of service, so that the body of Christ will be built up, until we all become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ.

Why Do We Think Of Leaders As The Ones Who Speak?

Let’s compare the current paradigms with the Bible’s instructions. Most churches think of leaders as the ones who speak. They get to have the microphone! Growing Christians who aren’t recognized as leaders covet that position. The immature are happy to sit and enjoy the program.

Many leaders and immature Christians are happy with this paradigm. There’s no concept of the leaders’ role being “until we all become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ.” There is no vision for maturity. Few leaders can even imagine saying, “It’s better for you that I leave,” as Jesus did with his disciples. If we aim for maturity, we must strive towards Christians eating spiritual meat by doing the works of Jesus and teaching each other.

The Bible’s instructions for Christian meetings and discipleship are opposed to the current paradigm! If our paradigm fails to facilitate Christians doing Jesus’ works, teaching each other, and ministering in God’s grace as 1st Corinthians 12 and 14 describe, then we hinder maturity rather than promoting it. Our system works against God’s goal, which is for the whole church to attain to maturity and the whole measure of the fullness of Christ.

The status-quo paradigm of leaders as the ones who speak hinders maturity rather than promoting it. This is the opposite of what God intends.

A Radical Paradigm Shift!

Our book, “I am Persuaded,” examines Jesus’ teaching about Christian leadership. God’s design for Christian leadership is radically different than greatness as the world sees it. In God’s Kingdom, the first will be last and the last will be first. The greatest is the servant of all. God’s wisdom is foolishness to the world, yet it is wiser than human wisdom. God’s paradigm for Christian leadership is foolishness to worldly values regarding leadership and greatness. Yet the current status-quo paradigm for church leadership is all too similar to how the world sees greatness.

Before sharing a radical thought about how servant leadership applies to speaking in the church, I want to clarify that this is truth in tension. Elders and teachers do have speaking roles. Elders have more experience, so we pay special attention to what they say. That being said, they are not the only ones who speak. What does Jesus’ teaching about Christian leadership imply regarding speaking?

Luke 22:24-27 (NIV) A dispute also arose among them as to which of them was considered to be greatest. Jesus said to them, “The kings of the Gentiles lord it over them; and those who exercise authority over them call themselves Benefactors. But you are not to be like that. Instead, the greatest among you should be like the youngest, and the one who rules like the one who serves. For who is greater, the one who is at the table or the one who serves? Is it not the one who is at the table? But I am among you as one who serves.

Jesus said the greatest among you should be like the youngest. What does this imply about speaking in the church? The youngest wait until last to speak. The youngest ask questions and listen to the others before expressing their own thoughts! When Jesus was twelve years old, his parents found him in the temple listening to the teachers and asking them questions!

As Job’s friends spoke foolishly and Job responded to them, Elihu the son of Barachel was angry because Job justified himself rather than God, and because his friends found no answer. After listening to everybody speak, Elihu said, “I am young in years, and you are aged.” He listened to those who were older and spoke last. (Job 32) God finally answered Job. Job confessed he’d spoken of things he didn’t understand, and he repented. God rebuked Job’s three friends. The only one who didn’t get a rebuke was Elihu, who was the last to speak!

Jesus also said that the first would be last, and the last would be first, and that whoever wants to be first must be your slave. What implications does this have for speaking? The slave defers to others and is the last to speak. He first listens.

In 3rd John verse nine, the Apostle John rebukes a man named Diotrophes who loved to be first and refused to welcome other believers. Might “loving to be first” include the desire to be the first to speak? Doesn’t welcoming other believers include allowing them to speak and listening to them? Our paradigm for leadership in the church is so far from Jesus’ teaching that many assume Diotrophes’ behavior is what leadership is supposed to look like!

Does Simon Sinek Get What Jesus Was Talking About?

Does Jesus’ teaching about Christian leadership really apply to speaking? It seems so radical! Let’s consider the matter further.

Bestselling author and business leader Simon Sinek teaches that great leaders speak last! He says, “The skill to hold your opinions to yourself until everyone has spoken does two things. One, it gives everybody else the feeling that they have been heard. It gives everyone else the ability to feel that they have contributed. And two, you get the benefit of hearing what everybody else has to think before you render your opinion. The skill is really to keep your opinions to yourself. If you agree with somebody, don’t nod ‘yes’. If you disagree with somebody, don’t nod ‘no.’ Simply sit there. Take it all in. And the only thing you’re allowed to do is ask questions so that you can understand what they mean and why they have the opinion that they have. You must understand from where they are speaking, why they have the opinion they have, not just what they are saying… and at the end, you will have your turn.”

Sinek observes: Well-intentioned leaders, we sit at the head of the table and say, “Well, here’s the problem we have and this is what I think we should do but I want to know what you think.” Too late! You’ve biased the room, as if their opinion doesn’t matter. As opposed to sitting down and saying, “Here’s the problem. I want to know what you think.”

Sinek uses Nelson Mandela’s words to illustrate this truth: “A journalist once asked [Nelson Mandela] how it is he came to be such a great leader – and he said that when he was a kid, he remembered going to tribal meetings with his father. And he remembers two things: one, they would always sit in a circle, and two, his father would always be the last to speak. And I think that that is a better way of framing the phrase ‘be a better listener’; it’s practicing being the last person to speak. So often, well-intentioned leaders walk into a meeting and say “okay guys, here’s the problem, here’s what I think we should do, but I’m going to listen to what you have to say.” It’s too late, right? There’s a skill set that comes from when everybody else is speaking, you don’t agree or disagree or give away what you’re thinking – but rather, you take input and you ask questions to better understand where their perspective comes from. And at the end of it, not only do you make everyone else feel heard, but you also get the benefit of all of their thinking.”

I think Simon Sinek, a secular business leader, understands Jesus’ teaching on leadership better than many Christians do! The Holy Spirit spoke to me and said, “I want you to honor Jesus by honoring every member of the body of Christ.” First Peter 2:17 says, “Honor all men.” This includes listening to them. The Holy Spirit desires to manifest God’s grace through every member of Christ’s body, and that usually involves speaking. Simon Sinek teaches leaders to honor every member of the team.

First Corinthians 10:24 says, “No one should seek their own good, but the good of others.” I once read that the least effective way to retain information is to listen to a lecture with no interaction, and the most effective is to teach the subject you are learning. A leader who wants young Christians to be fully equipped for every good work encourages them to speak and act for the sake of their own maturity. Christian maturity and spiritual meat are associated with doing God’s works and being able to teach each other. Rather than seeking preeminence or needing to speak first, leaders who aim for the church’s maturity seek not their own good but the good of others.

The Wise Wait To Speak!

Are you still unconvinced that Christian Leaders should be willing to speak last? The New Testament church appointed elders as leaders. We respect elders for their wisdom. What does the Bible tell us about how the wise speak and listen?

James 1:19 says that everyone should be slow to speak and quick to listen! Proverbs says that the wise person keeps his knowledge to himself, weighs his answers, learns from rebukes, speaks with humility, holds his tongue, guards his lips, and doesn’t multiply words! A wise man listens to others, seeks guidance, attains wise counsel, and hears and increases learning! A man of understanding draws council out from the heart! On the other hand, Proverbs says there is more hope for a fool than for a person who is hasty in his words, and it is folly and shame to answer before listening! These are more reasons that it makes sense for a leader to listen before speaking!

How Do We Deal With The Challenges Of Everyone Speaking?

The idea of allowing everybody to speak terrifies many Christians! Some insist it will never work. This participatory order comes with unique challenges, but we must acknowledge that it is God’s command, not a mere suggestion. We ought to first humble ourselves and acknowledge that God is right. He is wiser than we are, even if doing things his way is challenging! After first submitting to God, we can consider the challenges involved in Christian meetings that allow all to speak.

First Corinthians 13, the famous love chapter, is in the context of this order of a Christian meeting with all participating! First Corinthians 14:40, “Let everything be done decently and in order,” is also in this context. These exhortations regarding love and orderliness equip us to deal with the challenges posed by participatory gatherings.

First Corinthians 13 begins, “If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.”

Love thinks soberly according to the measure of grace we have been given. It says, “I have something of God’s grace that I want to share with the church,” but it also acknowledges that I’m not the only one with something to share. The goal is edification, not wanting to have the preeminence to the detriment of others! Scripture continues,”Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.”

The context of this exhortation to be patient and kind, not envious, boastful, or proud, not self-seeking, but honoring others, is instruction for a Christian meeting in which we all function together as the body of Christ. This exhortation was needed to give order as all spoke and ministered in God’s grace!

The Bible’s Instructions For Leaders Only Make Sense In The Context Of Many Speaking!

The pastoral epistles of Titus and First and Second Timothy deal much with a leader’s responsibility to correct false doctrine. These instructions only make sense in the context of many people speaking. Today, many Christians prefer a monologue to the problems caused by having so many people speaking. They avoid such problems rather than deal with them as the Bible instructs. By doing so, they do not allow the church to function as God wills.

In Titus 1:9, Paul wrote that an elder must hold firmly to the trustworthy message as it has been taught so that he can encourage others by sound doctrine and refute those who oppose it. Yet this has little relevance when church is a program in which only one person speaks. There is nobody to refute or correct if nobody but the pastor speaks!

The problem we often face today is that rather than recognizing a Biblical plurality of elders and pastors, we have one pastor who gives a monologue. Then, there is nobody to correct or refute him if he starts teaching false doctrine! Erronious teaching can often be corrected with as much as a simple question, without even any need to argue. But monologues do not permit questions, correction, or testing what is said!

Paul writes in Titus 1:11 that those who are teaching false doctrines must be silenced. However, such a command is irrelevant in a Christian meeting in which everybody is silenced, not just those teaching false doctrines! In Titus 3:9-11, Paul writes, “avoid foolish controversies and genealogies and arguments and quarrels about the law, because these are unprofitable and useless. Warn a divisive person once, and then warn them a second time. After that, have nothing to do with them. You may be sure that such people are warped and sinful; they are self-condemned.” Yet there is little need for the instruction to warn a divisive person or avoid foolish controversies and arguments in a church program centered around a monologue! The exhortation to avoid unprofitable conversations only makes sense in a context in which there is conversation!

2nd Timothy 3:16 says scripture is useful for rebuking, correcting, and training in righteousness. Paul tells Timothy to correct, rebuke, and encourage in Chapter 4 verse 2. In First Timothy 1:3, Paul writes, “Command certain people not to teach false doctrines any longer.” He doesn’t tell Timothy to stop everybody else from teaching, as many churches operate today!

Elders’ responsibility to correct and rebuke only makes sense in the participatory environment that scripture commands. Does the person who corrects and rebukes speak first or last?

Some people imagine that the participation scripture commands, with everybody speaking, will cause false doctrine to proliferate. History shows that the opposite is true. Monologue sermons in which questions and disagreement are taboo result in false doctrine. Questioning, disagreeing, discussing, and receiving correction promotes sound doctrine, not error.

Leaders Give Godly Examples, Facilitate, and Correct!

Some people ask, “If leaders aren’t the ones who speak, then what do they do?” As I shared in “I Am Persuaded,” the New Testament uses the terms “elder,” “pastor” and “bishop” interchangeably. Elders have an important role in the church, but it is not to speak while everyone else only listens. The elders’ purpose is to bring the church to maturity, and spiritual meat is equated with doing God’s will and teaching each other.

Spiritual milk is associated with saying, “I follow Paul” or “I follow Apollos.”Therefore, Elders encourage Christians to take personal possession of their faith and be taught by the Lord rather than depending on a human leader. Elders encourage Christians to think about and wrestle with God’s word for themselves rather than blindly accepting what someone else says.

Elders facilitate, encouraging young Christians to move in God’s grace and power. Elders ask questions. Elders allow others to speak and act first, then they correct! Elders make sure that our meetings are done “decently and in order” to edify the whole church and honor the grace God gives to every member of the body of Christ!

God desires to manifest his grace through every member of Christ’s body in our gatherings through supernatural grace-effects, which typically require speaking. God desires for the whole church to move in his power, speaking as those who speak the very words of God and acting by the Holy Spirit’s enablement. Elders should have God’s agenda, not their own. They are servants of Christ.

Elders are not entertainers for us to watch but examples for us to imitate. They must be examples of moving in the Holy Spirit’s power and encouraging others to do likewise. Their goal is not preeminence, but the church’s maturity! They are like coaches on the sidelines, not the team’s star players!

Is your church ready to recognize and receive these kinds of leaders? What do you value? Do you value church leaders who show preference for others, facilitate rather than dominate, and happily wait to speak last? Or are you all too happy to have a leader who takes first place, acts as the star player instead of a team player, and coddles immaturity?

Does your church encourage timid young Christians to pray, share, and act in God’s grace and power? Or does it hold back young Christians who are full of God’s word and want to share? Is the way we are doing church promoting maturity as defined by scripture, or is it hindering it? Are we promoting the function of every member of the body of Christ, or are we suppressing it? All prophesied on the day of Pentecost. Since the Holy Spirit chooses to distribute God’s grace through every member of Christ’s body, we will only receive all God has for us when we allow all to speak!